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How exactly can I deal with things in the series? - Rares - 10-27-2016
I'm having a very difficult time struggling with something in particular, and was wondering if anyone could relate, or had any similar experiences and know how to deal with things. I'm having a very, very difficult time watching the show. Most parts of it at least, mostly the season premiers and finales, and episodes in between, as well as parts of the Equestria Girls movies.
The reason is it's been really hurting me watching it seem like Rarity is always useless and/or gets captured and can't accomplish anything when things matter. For example, I still can't bare to finish the S4 finale, I've always shut it off just before "fight" because I just keep feel like they're saying she's useless. I have yet to watch the S5 finale for the reason that it just seems like a victim, and the S6 finale is actually making me a bit irrational thinking about it. I was okay with the first two EQG movies, but seeing her as just a "battery" as described in the third one really upset me. Makes me afraid to watch the 4th one, I don't want to see her useless again.
I used to hate Twilight because at first, when I was irrational, I blamed her for causing these things. (I'm sorry to those of you who love her, I didn't mean it. But it's how I've gotten and how my mind ended up operating under that irrationality.) I guess it was that not only do I love Rarity and need to see her safe, but seeing me reflected in her too, I felt like insecurities about me being useless might have been coming up too.
So I was wondering, has anyone ever felt a similar way about something, and if so, have ways to deal with this? It's something I'd really like to work on. I mean, I think it's okay to not like that she's not doing anything in the finales and such, but what I want to fix in myself is that irrationally upset mindset. And like I said, I think where the problem is coming from is not just my love and concern for her safety, but also seeing my reflection of myself.
How can I prevent that? I kind of want to make it a goal to not get like this for whatever happens in S7.
RE: How exactly can I deal with things in the series? - Gray - 10-27-2016
(10-27-2016, 11:04 AM)Rares Wrote: I'm having a very difficult time struggling with something in particular, and was wondering if anyone could relate, or had any similar experiences and know how to deal with things. I'm having a very, very difficult time watching the show. Most parts of it at least, mostly the season premiers and finales, and episodes in between, as well as parts of the Equestria Girls movies.
The reason is it's been really hurting me watching it seem like Rarity is always useless and/or gets captured and can't accomplish anything when things matter. For example, I still can't bare to finish the S4 finale, I've always shut it off just before "fight" because I just keep feel like they're saying she's useless. I have yet to watch the S5 finale for the reason that it just seems like a victim, and the S6 finale is actually making me a bit irrational thinking about it. I was okay with the first two EQG movies, but seeing her as just a "battery" as described in the third one really upset me. Makes me afraid to watch the 4th one, I don't want to see her useless again.
I used to hate Twilight because at first, when I was irrational, I blamed her for causing these things. (I'm sorry to those of you who love her, I didn't mean it. But it's how I've gotten and how my mind ended up operating under that irrationality.) I guess it was that not only do I love Rarity and need to see her safe, but seeing me reflected in her too, I felt like insecurities about me being useless might have been coming up too.
So I was wondering, has anyone ever felt a similar way about something, and if so, have ways to deal with this? It's something I'd really like to work on. I mean, I think it's okay to not like that she's not doing anything in the finales and such, but what I want to fix in myself is that irrationally upset mindset. And like I said, I think where the problem is coming from is not just my love and concern for her safety, but also seeing my reflection of myself.
How can I prevent that? I kind of want to make it a goal to not get like this for whatever happens in S7.
Oh man, I don't know what to say. I can't help or anything, but I can, I dunno, share in your feelings? Because I also get sad and upset watching the more recent episodes. Twilight is always so happy and excited for map adventures, but she's always getting left behind, and is sad when left behind.
RE: How exactly can I deal with things in the series? - Rares - 10-27-2016
(10-27-2016, 11:24 AM)Gray Wrote: Oh man, I don't know what to say. I can't help or anything, but I can, I dunno, share in your feelings? Because I also get sad and upset watching the more recent episodes. Twilight is always so happy and excited for map adventures, but she's always getting left behind, and is sad when left behind.Thank you, it's still means a lot to talk to someone who at least shares how I feel.
So, if it's okay for me to ask a followup, do you find the show to be important? Like, I'm just not sure if I should continue to hold the show in high regard if I'm starting to feel like this, but I just feel like if I don't, would that be doing something wrong?
RE: How exactly can I deal with things in the series? - Kaltes-Herzeleid - 10-27-2016
I can relate too. I often feel like Nightmare is unfairly overshadowed by most of the other villains and it annoys me. There was a point I pretty much hated all the other villains (one in particular) though that hate has died down to indifference, most of the time. Over the years I've gotten pretty good at ignoring negative things people say about it, though I will admit sometimes it stings. There's been a couple of times people have said things about her to try and antagonize me. They can get fucked up the ass with a lemon juice covered cactus for all I care.
Sorry if none of this helps or was a waste of time, I suppose I'm the oddball out because, well, Nightmare isn't in the show much 'cause she's a villain. Most of my experiences come from outside the show.
RE: How exactly can I deal with things in the series? - 7bloom - 10-27-2016
I understand your feelings. They're nothing to be ashamed of. I relate, in my own way. Apple Bloom totally forgotten for most of the season, and treated badly half of the time where she actually did get to show up. Neglecting the kindness and understanding that used to be in her relationship with Applejack was the worst to see, for me. I always loved to see her getting along with her family, and the way AJ treated her in Carts Before the Ponies without even any satisfying apology hurt. Season 5 had me optimistic and excited for her to be treated more seriously, so for her to get less than ever was disappointing. All this, along with the vague dread over what she meant when she said she'd keep dancing, wondering if that's a significant part of her life now, behind the scenes and how else she could change.
Because she and her friends were excluded (while snips&snails weren't) from the new EQG movie, along with the focus on romance, I've decided not to watch it. I realize that I have that choice, and don't feel bad about it. That comforting thought makes me realize that if things get so bad that I lose hope in the show's treatment of her, I don't have to watch it. I have the freedom and control to ignore it as I enjoy and appreciate her other roles that made me like her so much in the first place, and there'd be no shame in it. If watching the show puts stress on your relationship, it's important to keep in mind that you have no obligation to it (the show), and that we shouldn't be forced to adapt to everything they put out.
With so many different writers, there's bound to be differing, contradictory views of the characters making their way into the show. There's little sense or balance in it, in the first place, so having difficulty reacting rationally and trying to make sense of it while thinking deeply about the character is only natural.
(10-27-2016, 01:34 PM)Rares Wrote: So, if it's okay for me to ask a followup, do you find the show to be important? Like, I'm just not sure if I should continue to hold the show in high regard if I'm starting to feel like this, but I just feel like if I don't, would that be doing something wrong?It's only been recently that I started thinking this way, but I think that not only is it okay to give the show less importance in your feelings when it's going bad, but should be recommended. The character in the show is just a character, to the staff. At a whim, they could contradict something you hold dear. As your waifu, though, she's more than that. She's not just some tool to move the plot forward. You have the freedom to hold onto your preferred view of her while putting separation between her and the character.
RE: How exactly can I deal with things in the series? - Gentian - 10-28-2016
(10-27-2016, 11:04 AM)Rares Wrote: I'm having a very difficult time struggling with something in particular, and was wondering if anyone could relate, or had any similar experiences and know how to deal with things. I'm having a very, very difficult time watching the show. Most parts of it at least, mostly the season premiers and finales, and episodes in between, as well as parts of the Equestria Girls movies.
The reason is it's been really hurting me watching it seem like Rarity is always useless and/or gets captured and can't accomplish anything when things matter. For example, I still can't bare to finish the S4 finale, I've always shut it off just before "fight" because I just keep feel like they're saying she's useless. I have yet to watch the S5 finale for the reason that it just seems like a victim, and the S6 finale is actually making me a bit irrational thinking about it. I was okay with the first two EQG movies, but seeing her as just a "battery" as described in the third one really upset me. Makes me afraid to watch the 4th one, I don't want to see her useless again.
I used to hate Twilight because at first, when I was irrational, I blamed her for causing these things. (I'm sorry to those of you who love her, I didn't mean it. But it's how I've gotten and how my mind ended up operating under that irrationality.) I guess it was that not only do I love Rarity and need to see her safe, but seeing me reflected in her too, I felt like insecurities about me being useless might have been coming up too.
So I was wondering, has anyone ever felt a similar way about something, and if so, have ways to deal with this? It's something I'd really like to work on. I mean, I think it's okay to not like that she's not doing anything in the finales and such, but what I want to fix in myself is that irrationally upset mindset. And like I said, I think where the problem is coming from is not just my love and concern for her safety, but also seeing my reflection of myself.
How can I prevent that? I kind of want to make it a goal to not get like this for whatever happens in S7.
Ok, I wanted to reply to this in the worst way, but couldn't find the video I wanted to link you to, and ran out of time and had to go to work. It was 1250 my time then, and now I'm back and it's 2230, and there are so many replies that say what I wanted to, but did it better than I could. Seriously, everyone in this thread is outstanding, and you are all reminding me why I'm here. You guys are great.
This is the video I wanted you to see. Maybe you have already? If not, the part I'm referring to is from 0:20 - 1:30. Rarity is awesome. She is my 2nd favorite of the M6, behind you-know-who. I like her not only for the reasons DWK outlined in his video, but for the way she exemplifies her element: generosity. Not just with her possessions, but her time, her consideration, everything. Who made 5 dresses, gratis, for her friends to their specifications despite knowing very well they would hurt her business? Rarity. Who gave Spike the biggest, shiniest gem of them all, despite needing it for her business? Rarity. Who has...well there's too many instances to count.
She's shown time, and time again that she's willing to give, and give, and give of herself to make someone's day that much brighter. As someone who, shall we say, is well acquainted with not having enough, this selflessness struck a chord, and has kept her near the top of my list of favorite ponies from day 1. #1 of the M6, in fact, until Twilight started talking to me.
Warden has expressed very succinctly that the writers need conflict. As a Celybeans-fan, I'm incredibly disappointed that she's so easily swatted aside for plot's sake, and that we still haven't gotten a Celestia episode even 6 seasons in. But they have to do that, because if they showed her at her true power, there would be no conflict. Nightmare's portrayal in the premiere was abysmal. But again, if she had been shown at her true power, the M6 would have never reached the Elements of Harmony. Applejack's treatment of her sister was horrific in The Cart Before the Ponies. But the writers need conflict. The list goes on.
The best remedy that I know is just to remember canon doesn't matter. It seems everyone who isn't a writer can see how wonderful Rarity is. Just watch that video, and read these replies, if you doubt that. You've expressed an interest in creating a tulpa. Maybe, when you've reached the point she can talk back to you, you'll be able to laugh together with her at the silliness the writers put out, instead of letting it turn you off to the whole show. Maybe that will help, too. And of course, we're here.
RE: How exactly can I deal with things in the series? - Rares - 10-28-2016
Aw geez, so much I want to respond to. Sorry if this becomes an extra-long post.
(10-27-2016, 01:41 PM)Kaltes-Herzeleid Wrote: Sorry if none of this helps or was a waste of time, I suppose I'm the oddball out because, well, Nightmare isn't in the show much 'cause she's a villain. Most of my experiences come from outside the show.It does help, thank you. I mean it's already enough to know others go through these types of feelings too, and seeing how they handle them in different ways. So thank you.
(10-27-2016, 01:48 PM)7bloom Wrote: I understand your feelings. They're nothing to be ashamed of. I relate, in my own way. Apple Bloom totally forgotten for most of the season, and treated badly half of the time where she actually did get to show up. Neglecting the kindness and understanding that used to be in her relationship with Applejack was the worst to see, for me. I always loved to see her getting along with her family, and the way AJ treated her in Carts Before the Ponies without even any satisfying apology hurt. Season 5 had me optimistic and excited for her to be treated more seriously, so for her to get less than ever was disappointing. All this, along with the vague dread over what she meant when she said she'd keep dancing, wondering if that's a significant part of her life now, behind the scenes and how else she could change.
Because she and her friends were excluded (while snips&snails weren't) from the new EQG movie, along with the focus on romance, I've decided not to watch it. I realize that I have that choice, and don't feel bad about it. That comforting thought makes me realize that if things get so bad that I lose hope in the show's treatment of her, I don't have to watch it. I have the freedom and control to ignore it as I enjoy and appreciate her other roles that made me like her so much in the first place, and there'd be no shame in it. If watching the show puts stress on your relationship, it's important to keep in mind that you have no obligation to it (the show), and that we shouldn't be forced to adapt to everything they put out.
With so many different writers, there's bound to be differing, contradictory views of the characters making their way into the show. There's little sense or balance in it, in the first place, so having difficulty reacting rationally and trying to make sense of it while thinking deeply about the character is only natural.
Cart Before the Ponies was definitely an episode that I had some issues with too, though you can probably imagine for different reasons. That really didn't seem at all like a way Rarity would behave. I mean maybe to an extent, but the Rarity I know wouldn't have held a grudge like that, nor have let it get in the way of her sister. So I was a bit hurt seeing how they portrayed her that time.
But I guess that means the thing I need to then working on is separating the Rarity I know, from the character on TV. I mean, I was introduced to her from the character, but I guess I need to remember that it may be representing her, but it isn't her. The thing I need to work on is although I'm unhappy with the majority of the show at this point (not to say I hate everything, there's still some things I like, S5 has 2 of my favorite episodes now and I enjoyed some of S6) I feel like I can't separate myself from it because of how it introduced me to her. I worry sometimes that I don't know, it's a bond I'm afraid not to worry about. If that makes sense. I mean, typically when it comes to the comics, because there's definitely a bit of bad stuff in that, I end up just brushing it off like a bad fanfic, but with the show I treat it differently for some reason. But maybe I don't have to.
(10-27-2016, 01:50 PM)TheWarden Wrote: To me, the show is like how the equestrian version of Hollywood would portray the events of the famous ponies. NOT how they actually happened in the ponies real lives. It is overly dramatic, and lifts some characters up while putting others down.Thank you very much, that idea really helps a lot. I think that's how I'll have to start perceiving things, because that will definitely help if I can just remember that the show if anything is closer to "Based on a true story" rather than the reality of what's going on. Like I mentioned, I think I just need to find a way to remind myself that the show isn't exactly the reality of what's going on. Just seems easier said that done since I still hold that attachment because it was how I was introduced to her, so I fear I have to take it as law. But if I keep in mind that it's just an adaption, I think I can work on getting over that.
My advice to you is to know that your love is capable of so much more than they portray her as, and if they don't dare use her brilliance to the fullest potential, it's their loss.
(10-28-2016, 12:09 AM)Gentian Wrote: The best remedy that I know is just to remember canon doesn't matter. It seems everyone who isn't a writer can see how wonderful Rarity is. Just watch that video, and read these replies, if you doubt that. You've expressed an interest in creating a tulpa. Maybe, when you've reached the point she can talk back to you, you'll be able to laugh together with her at the silliness the writers put out, instead of letting it turn you off to the whole show. Maybe that will help, too. And of course, we're here.Thank you, and thanks for the video. I guess I just at first, like I said, felt that "canon was law". So that's what I should then try to overcome. And I feel I've made progress, but these feelings really started to come up badly again after the S6 finale, and I just needed to get a hold of myself. I do think a tulpa might be able to help me a lot, so I create something I know. It's kind of like that with my plushies, but it's not quite strong. Maybe then I should work on that so there's better communication. Thank you forletting me be here, too.
I'm really sorry, I feel incredibly guilty that I used to blame Twilight for this, and I regret that. I hope you guys, or her, aren't upset with me because of how I've thought irrationally before.
RE: How exactly can I deal with things in the series? - EquestrianPenguin - 10-28-2016
A tip from a person with a somewhat similar situation
Spitfire is shown to be a bitch some times in the show, many people think she is in the fandom and don't like her. I've come to terms with it in two different ways, understanding her show behavior and rationalizing it, and second, remember that she's not my spitfire, and although it sucks when people call her a bitch and don't understand why she's the pony I like, they can't understand because she's unique to me. She's mine and I hers, the events in her equestrian are separate from in show.
I hope I helped somehow
RE: How exactly can I deal with things in the series? - Pacifist - 10-28-2016
I have been sort of lucky in I haven't had this sort of problem with the show and Maud.
Though I still feel a slight disconnect in how the show portrays her and how I imagine her, but I can't put a finger on it exactly.
RE: How exactly can I deal with things in the series? - Mercyknight - 05-06-2018
(10-28-2016, 08:06 AM)Pacifist Wrote: I have been sort of lucky in I haven't had this sort of problem with the show and Maud.
Though I still feel a slight disconnect in how the show portrays her and how I imagine her, but I can't put a finger on it exactly.
my take on this exact disconnect is the show is one universe, your version is another. the show showed us the way but not to that universe, it shows us to our own version of equestria, etc. by seeing the show, your minds eye opened t a unique version of what you saw.. ponies there can differ from the show.
in mine, the show happens to them, but they still do other stuff outside of what you see in the show. my Luna for instance is as shy and quiet as shown in the show with others, but with me, she seems to be more outspoken than Tia because we share more of a connection. thanks to certain events in history, i believe she had that connection for a long time longer than i knew of her, or at least the puzzle pieces were in place to build such of one before we met