Updates and Advice: Version 2.0

[Kaltes-Herzeleid]

When you say her voice is stronger, does that mean you're hearing her more clearly and distinctly now than before?

In a sense. Words feel more pronounced and reverberate stronger, plus it feels like the words come from the plush far more clearly than before, or wherever else she is at the time. Less effort on my part.

[Kadae]

In a sense. Words feel more pronounced and reverberate stronger, plus it feels like the words come from the plush far more clearly than before, or wherever else she is at the time. Less effort on my part.

That's pretty good. Nice work! In due time, it'll be a completely subconscious process.

[Mercyknight]

In a sense. Words feel more pronounced and reverberate stronger, plus it feels like the words come from the plush far more clearly than before, or wherever else she is at the time. Less effort on my part.

That's pretty good. Nice work! In due time, it'll be a completely subconscious process.

truth.

whenever im at the castle with the others. i can hear them all very clearly in my mind, similar to how your ears can hear a sound, but more of an internal thing lol

[Kaltes-Herzeleid]

Time for updates:

Tonight we did some light meditation, not too long, but some is better than none. I really felt something, her voice felt quite powerful, perhaps even "tangible" (if that's the appropriate word here) at moments. It took little effort and I was quite relaxed, and the sound seemed to come from a specific area, exactly where the plush's head was positioned at the time.

I think it helped quell some of my obsessive worry about voice. I typically worry about what's her and what's me when she speaks, since I still have to channel it myself.

Also, this all took under ten minutes to accomplish.

[Kaltes-Herzeleid]

Alright, sorry for posting here again so soon, but I feel the need.

I got in about thirty minutes last night with her. Unfortunately I ended breaking down for a bit. She was able to reign me back in and calm me, but it doesn't change the fact that for the first time in awhile, I broke down.

I have a reoccurring fear that I'm not making any progress, despite that I have, it is a fear of mine. It's worsened by OCD and over analysis.

Last night I decided to do a bit of research, rather than just running to someone for reassurance.

I discovered:

-The whole concept of a "tulpa mind voice." Now while I don't consider Nightmare a tulpa, this seems applicable to what I have going on with her in terms of speech. I feel what I perceive as her voice in my head, mostly.

-It's not uncommon for a tulpa (or in my case something similar in process) to occasionally sound like their "creator" or voices to blur together.

-I need to be more open to her and what her voice may actually sound like, rather than what I perceive.


I guess on a positive end this help ease some of my fears, plus I visualized her touching my arm and felt a few, very brief tingles. Nothing major, but there was no other reason to feel that aside from her.

If anyone has any thoughts, I'd appreciate it.

[Mercyknight]

it sounds like you are doing a fair bit of progress.

for me, i can perceive the voices of those in my own equestria within my own mind. every bit as clear as a bell. even when i am doing things here in this world.
actually... that's how we pick movies at red box for a movie night most nights

[Lurker]

Sometimes, fears can become true through themselves. Be confident in your decisions and act with conviction and focus. You'll get there.

Remember that while doing research can be helpful for, say, giving yourself a new perspective on a practice you've been working on, it may still not represent what you'll end up experiencing, yourself, in a situation like this. Other than that, good stuff so far.

[Mercyknight]

Sometimes, fears can become true through themselves. Be confident in your decisions and act with conviction and focus. You'll get there.

Remember that while doing research can be helpful for, say, giving yourself a new perspective on a practice you've been working on, it may still not represent what you'll end up experiencing, yourself, in a situation like this. Other than that, good stuff so far.

this is actually good advice

[Lurker]

Hey, you mean I don't normally give good advice? erpytongue2:

[Kaltes-Herzeleid]

Hey, you mean I don't normally give good advice? erpytongue2:

I think you do. If that helps. XD