Writings and Stories

[Kaltes-Herzeleid]

Ditch
----

The vessel awakes, coughing, fingers digging into slick earth. From the back of its throat the vessel hacks once more, shakily pushing itself up.


Its body is cold. How long has it been here, in this ditch? Like it'd been waiting in a haze of stagnation since time's lonely beginning. Since existence itself had lurched into consciousness.


The vessel stands to its feet, the grass pressed beneath it, sticking out like follicles of fine hair in the grasp of a hand. The vessel steps forward, stumbling only to catch itself with pale hands.


The vessel is stunned. Hands. It curled its fingers into the soil, the life of the ground upon whence it stood, taking clumps with it.


Again the vessel begins moving, lurching into the world. Fog hangs over the land, the black road slick. The vessel looks at it. Alien ground. Not soft and safe like the earth. The vessel sees a blurred, distorted thing looking back. Contorted in hard blackness.


Confusion. What is it seeing?


A face?


It touches its face, smearing dirt.


Across the way is pasture for cows, enclosed by a fence with sharp wire. There are no such animals in sight, only wind and crickets. The vessel looks to its left, then to the right, its movement creaking and stiff. It looks for the source of wind.


What is wind?


It looks up. The moon is the first face it sees. Shining white like a sky bound pearl, it reaches to catch it. It looks at the empty, dirt caked hand, confusion settled in the blurring haze that acted as a brain.


A piercing shriek draws its focus to a figure standing in the road. It is a woman.


What is a woman?


She is bright, like an angel.


What is an angel?


Why is she screaming? Is it a demon? What is a demon?


The vessel moves toward her, it feels its skin twitching and crawling all over. The woman just screams.


Did she come from the ditch too?


Answers are nonexistent.




----
A short, original writing loosely inspired by the message at the end of Tool's song Disgustipated.


What the meaning of this little writing? I don't fully know. Does it mean something to you?

[Kaltes-Herzeleid]

Serendipity
----

It's interesting where our lives can go. Is it all just random, pleasant fortune or is it fate? Ingrained in us from the moment of our birth and as utterly immovable as the oldest of mountains? I ask myself these questions nearly everyday since we found each other.

I never would've have imagined somehow a man who had devoted so much of his life to rage and hate most powerful act would stem from love. And that the hope you may reciprocate these feelings could be true.

I watch Nightmare gracefully move across smooth, glistening black stones just beneath the shallowest part of a gently flowing river. In the night its as black as the deepest reaches of freezing space, its depths as unknowable as the silence in the beginning of time. Her hair flows as she playfully leaps to the shore, droplets fly freely from her elegant hooves, starlight reflecting for the briefest of moments within them before they vanish into darkness.

"Take care not to slip," she intoned softly, the long grass swaying from the caress of early summer winds.

I move across with ease, ripples generating from my little path across the onyx stones looking up at me. With a careful hop I landed on the soft grass beside her to quickly drape an arm across her shoulders and pull her close. The familiar softness of jet black fur, the heat of her body and movement of toned muscles under the flesh and fur as she walked along side me; our steps in perfect unison as we made our way along the welcoming earth without another soul in our sights.

"You weren't looking."

"Hm?"

"The stones. You could have slipped."

My eyes shifted towards her, my arm enjoying the familiar tickle of her mane faintly brushing against it.

"I know you'd never let me fall, Nightmare."

She only smiled at that, knowing my statement to be as true as the black river we had crossed moments ago. My thoughts drifted to the ripples our feet had made as we made our way across. We each made ripples in the well of time and distance until one night they touched, not cancelling the other out but rather merging together as one to travel outward. Endlessly, the darkness bathing two joined souls in its comfort as they continued their journey.

Whether it be serendipity or the power of destiny, I have no objects to it. I...we are where we are supposed to be. It is the feeling of absolute truth in the core of our hearts

[Gentian]

The imagery was fantastic. Ripples in the river of time joining together. Man.

[Kaltes-Herzeleid]

Reflection
----

The Man sits alone in his living room, back against the soft cushions of his chair, hands dangling limply over the armrests. In his right he holds a glass of wine, so dark it might've been purple.

But in the shadows it is black.

The house is dark. The noise of a ticking clock is dissonant and fuzzy, like hearing underwater. Tick, tock, tick, tock over and over. Time is moving towards something.

"Daddy, I'm scared. The dark scares me."

Who said that? A son? A daughter? Himself?

Time moves to the beginning.

The Man sits in his chair, staring ahead at the dark before his hazy eyes. He can imagine the shadows shifting and twisting like fabric.

He blinks.

The Man looks, mind to the blackness as it concentrates in on upon itself until it too is man shaped. The Man feels a hollow jolt in his sternum and he suddenly remembers he has a heart. The littlest movement so sudden his glass of wine shatters on the floor, seeping into the dull carpet, staining it with abyss.

The Shadow steps out from its womb and for this exact moment in fresh time the Man and the Shadow exist in the same place. The Shadow regards the Man with its blank face, its body the perfect image of a normal flesh and blood man.

Anybody?

The Man watches the Shadow walk soundlessly to the door. He absently notes that the clock has stopped ticking.

The Shadow methodically unlocks the door, pausing once to grip the cold handle.

The Man watches. The Shadow opens the door, spilling white into the house. But the white is tainted as the Shadow greets it, and with one step it is outside.

The clock ticks away once more.

[Kaltes-Herzeleid]

I've been inspired by my good friend Gentian's post here to write down some of my thoughts and fantasies, I've never really done it before so I thought it might be fun. I'm posting it here because I've already posted in my relationship thread for the day, either way I wanted to share.


-Looking out at a massive, but calm lake late at night with Nightmare, seeing the sky reflected in its dark surface.

-Staying at a cabin high in the mountains, sitting on the couch with Nightmare in front of warm fire while it snows away outside.

-Flying through the depths of far space in her grasp, letting my fingertips trail through silver stardust.

-Allowing her to gently touch my face.

-Closing my eyes and gently explore Nightmare's body with my hands, imagining her expressions as her soft fur meets my skin.

-Brushing her beautiful mane and tail.

-Massaging her after a long day of ruling and politics.

-Her massaging me.

-Listening to heartbeat in the dead of night.

-Picking her up at random so her hooves don't have to touch the ground and carrying her everywhere.

-Listening to songs that remind me of her our and relationship and holding her all the while.

-Nightmare kissing me, feeling her tongue slip into and explore my mouth.

-Feeling Nightmare pull me close to her at night when she thinks I've fallen asleep.

-Looking at the planet from the moon with her.

-Bringing Nightmare a blue rose.

Spoiler

-Esdeath teaching me how to fight.

-Talking with her at night, Esdeath insisting on dropping the formalities and addressing each other by name.

-Esdeath slipping an ice cube down the back of my shirt, just for the giggles. Bonus points for using it to wake me up.

-Fighting alongside her.

-Being on the island with her.

-Having difficulty falling asleep, so she holds me in her arms, whispering comfortingly to me until I finally sleep.

-Helping her understand art with varying degrees of success, but finding my enthusiasm and words endearing anyway.

[Kaltes-Herzeleid]

These are my thoughts, musings, and observations on Shin Godzilla. These are thoughts I've compiled in my mind for some time, analysis, potential and personal meanings.


-"Do as you like."

Indifference?

Indifference of who?

Indifference of God? Indifference of humans?

Encouragement for Japan, or rather the people of Japan to take their lives into their own hands. Take back control.

A cruel jeer?

"Do as you like. You can't stop what will happen."

Godzilla coming ashore the first time is a massive reference to the 3/11 tsunami. Once more he has become the manifestation of a country's trauma.


-Humans

Yaguchi, Kayoko, and Ogashira are comparable to Shinji, Asuka, and Rei if they had healthy upbringings.

Prime Minister cares more about his image.

Government doesn't care about people. People are expendable.

Government is lazy, would rather let America deal with everything if given the opportunity.

Those who do not take their fates into their own hands die.

Humans would rather fight than solve problems.
They cannot believe the "fantastical" until it is too late.

Rebuild a country.

America's solution is to blow everything up. They don't care about people either.

Yaguchi rallies everyone together. He's an ideal, humanity cooperates. He actually cares.

Goro Maki must have truly loved his wife more than anyone or anything.


-Godzilla

"But I must carry on, nothing worse can befall."
But I must carry on, nothing worse than the fact I exist can befall.

Is Godzilla having an existential crisis?

He is sentient, he is complicated.

His beady eyes are looking down, he knows humans exist.

Does Godzilla want to watch us die?

He moves towards the bridge when the JSDF attacks, he counterattacked by kicking a part of the bridge on their command center. He is capable of strategy.

"Why didn't he just use his atomic ray?"
Why waste energy on killing insects who are mere nuisances?

He's similar to us.

Better than us.

Goro Maki let himself be absorbed by Godzilla. Does his consciousness still live on? Is he an influence on Godzilla? Probably not. What was the absorption like? Painful? Blissful? Is Maki just raw material for a perfect being? Most likely.

The Godzilla-Maki connection permanently links Godzilla to humans. Humanity is responsible for it all. Godzilla is our reflection, the manifestation of our wrongs, a horrifying truth humans can't bring themselves to admit.

Nature's Wrath.

Godzilla's atomic ray is purple. Purple is the color of power and royalty.
King of the Monsters.

He's covered in keloid scars. Does every single movement hurt?

Godzilla actually breathes fire for the first time in the franchise's history.

His atomic ray makes the same sound as Destoroyah's micro oxygen ray the first time it's used.

Godzilla continues to evolve.

What about his blood?

What about when the coagulant wears off?

Countdown will resume. It hasn't been erased, just prolonged.

They cannot avoid the inevitable.


-The Humanoids

Godzilla making man in his image?

Godzilla's fifth form?
I doubt it.

They appeared after Operation Yashiori.
Is Godzilla still conscious despite being frozen?

The art book showed angelic concept art for the humanoids. Could they have evolved into that?

Did the coagulant deform them?

Would they evolve into us?

How many similarities are there?

Humans fight an endless battle with themselves.

Would they be individuals or a hive mind?
Could they attain individuality?

Does Godzilla want companions?
His companions are extensions of himself.

Are they dead or just frozen?

They look to be in pain and horror. About what? The coagulant? Existence?

[Kaltes-Herzeleid]

Fire
----

Sea breeze whipped over the island, tree leaves flowing along with it, rustling and snapping. Stars twinkled in the sky above, their ancient light having traveled across countless light years to reach us on this particular night.

A small fire crackled dimly, embers faintly glowing and twigs slowly transforming into ashes that would soon be lost to the wind.

It wasn't really all that cold. Or maybe I just didn't feel it. Thoughtfully I ran my fingers through Nightmare's mane. She had draped herself across my lap, forelegs neatly crossed. In the fading light her blue eyes shone, many would find it jarring to see, how they pierce directly to your core without hesitation. Her tail flicked once.

"The fire will be out soon."

A statement vaguely disguised as a question, wind again. Brushing a few strands of loose purple hair from her lovely face I finally opted to respond. I made an effort to choose my words in a direct fashion. Sometimes I felt as though our words were some kind of invisible dance with each other and only we could comprehend their meaning. The meaning that lived between the letters of the words themselves, so neatly concealed it hid from the eyes of all others.

"You don't need to relight it Nightmare," I answered clearly, my arms pulling her dark form closer to my chest and I found she was pleasantly warm to the touch. My chin resting on her silky hair. Our shadows abstract distortions splashed along the soft earth and hard old tree trunks that dotted the land. Briefly, my eyes flitted upwards to the sky. There was no moon out tonight, only stars. I wondered if any of those stars were long gone now, yet even after their deaths their light traveled on without a worry in the universe. If they had consciousness did it know where it was supposed to go? Did it care? Would it?

So few saw light. Even fewer today did. The mechanical lights of cities blotted out the natural and seemingly nigh eternal of stars that sent us their glow. Perhaps they lost something in themselves they knew not they had because of it.

Once more my eyes returned to ground level, not at the feeble fire, but at the beautiful mare who now looked at me also. Nightmare gave a soft smile at me, a hoof stroking my arm, sending tingles along the length of it that made me exhale in contentment.

The last few tongues of orange flame flickered in desperation. A final, judging gust snuffed it all out. Darkness bathed us in its endless embrace, rewarded for its patience, her glowing sapphire eyes peering at me unblinkingly. I did not look away.

Nightmare was my dark and my light. All I needed.

[Gentian]

Fire
----

Sea breeze whipped over the island, tree leaves flowing along with it, rustling and snapping. Stars twinkled in the sky above, their ancient light having traveled across countless light years to reach us on this particular night.

A small fire crackled dimly, embers faintly glowing and twigs slowly transforming into ashes that would soon be lost to the wind.

It wasn't really all that cold. Or maybe I just didn't feel it. Thoughtfully I ran my fingers through Nightmare's mane. She had draped herself across my lap, forelegs neatly crossed. In the fading light her blue eyes shone, many would find it jarring to see, how they pierce directly to your core without hesitation. Her tail flicked once.

"The fire will be out soon."

A statement vaguely disguised as a question, wind again. Brushing a few strands of loose purple hair from her lovely face I finally opted to respond. I made an effort to choose my words in a direct fashion. Sometimes I felt as though our words were some kind of invisible dance with each other and only we could comprehend their meaning. The meaning that lived between the letters of the words themselves, so neatly concealed it hid from the eyes of all others.

"You don't need to relight it Nightmare," I answered clearly, my arms pulling her dark form closer to my chest and I found she was pleasantly warm to the touch. My chin resting on her silky hair. Our shadows abstract distortions splashed along the soft earth and hard old tree trunks that dotted the land. Briefly, my eyes flitted upwards to the sky. There was no moon out tonight, only stars. I wondered if any of those stars were long gone now, yet even after their deaths their light traveled on without a worry in the universe. If they had consciousness did it know where it was supposed to go? Did it care? Would it?

So few saw light. Even fewer today did. The mechanical lights of cities blotted out the natural and seemingly nigh eternal of stars that sent us their glow. Perhaps they lost something in themselves they knew not they had because of it.

Once more my eyes returned to ground level, not at the feeble fire, but at the beautiful mare who now looked at me also. Nightmare gave a soft smile at me, a hoof stroking my arm, sending tingles along the length of it that made me exhale in contentment.

The last few tongues of orange flame flickered in desperation. A final, judging gust snuffed it all out. Darkness bathed us in its endless embrace, rewarded for its patience, her glowing sapphire eyes peering at me unblinkingly. I did not look away.

Nightmare was my dark and my light. All I needed.

You did not disappoint.

[Kaltes-Herzeleid]

Now
----

I drew my coat a bit closer to my body (if such a thing was possible) as orange and reddish leaves skittered and bounced along the concrete to the wind's rhythm. I was half tempted to smile to myself, it'd been sometime since we'd had a fall season such as this. With chilled but comforting wind and the peace of a quiet night, the sensation of the world being still as the day it was created and that we were the only two in it.

"Moving a tad fast there," I heard Nightmare's voice close to my ear, warm breathe tickling my skin.

"Sorry love, just thinking."

"When aren't you?" She teased affectionately, lightly bumping me with a sleek but still strong shoulder. Long hair flowing elegantly as though performing some sort of twinkling dance around her beautiful face, blue hued eyes glowing at me as they always did. Even after three years her eyes still captivated me they same as they did when I'd first registered what was the beginnings of love.

"Are you cold?" I inquired, furrowing my brow.

"No," she replied gently. She was even without her tiara and necklace, no coat or cloak, or even a scarf. "I'm surprised you're even wearing a coat."

I shrugged and automatically wrapped a sleeved arm over her shoulders to hold her closer, a pleasurable jolt running from the tips of my fingers up the length of my arm as I touched her incredibly soft jet black fur. We continued to leisurely make our way down the path and back home. Half bare branches shifting softly and a near full moon shining down, bathing us in white light. Her hooves meeting the ground creating a familiar and strangely comforting sound, like a single song for the sky. Her regal tail flowing behind her with every step. Despite the wind she never lost her graceful poise or ethereal radiance.

I breathed out contentedly, lightly gripping a few strands of her mane in my hand. For the past three years I had looked at her and seen my completion. That abhorred pervasive emptiness had been long since exorcised from my soul. To an extent I could longer even recall what it felt like. Never in my life would I have dreamed that I'd ever attain such peace with someone I love.

Reaching into my pocket I pulled out my keys, the metal jingling together not unlike cheerful little bells. Unlocking the door I held it open for her, indicating she enter first with a courtly gesture. Smirking with a knowing chuckle she brushed my chin with her trailing, exquisitely soft tail. The room darkened further as I steadily shut the door and locking it with a subtle click. Nightmare Rarity's eyes glowed at me from where she stood, nearly bleeding into the darkness with blue glowing out at me. Only for me.

"I think we should rest now. We do have a holiday to prepare for after all."

Silently I approached her, my arms extending towards her to allow my hands to delicately touch her equine face. Moving slowly from her cheeks down the length of her slender snout, my eyes vaguely registered the flick of a black ear. Again I repeated the motion, earning a pleasant, breathy sigh.

She was here. This was now. And in the now, the past, and the future, we were completed beings.

"Happy Nightmare Night, my Queen."

Nightmare smiled back, the smile that was only for me and never ceased to be special.

"And a happy Nightmare Night to you, my love."

[Pacifist]

That is quite a beautiful story. I'm glad the two of you have this special day together.