Random thoughts post 'em

[Fiction]

Whoa, I apparently made it to the top posters at some point. Woohoo!

Crap! I knew this day would come, but I did not think it would be this soon. Must not allow myself to be overtaken by Kadae...

Come on guys, I was gone for 3 months straight and im still way ahead

Top Poster War 2k16

[Kadae]

I still don't know what my grandma puts in her fantastically tasty potato salad.

I should just ask her for that recipe some day.

Top Poster War 2k16

Grab onto your gonads 'cause it's gonna get intense!

[Kaltes-Herzeleid]

I hate the ugliness the world brings out in me.

[Kadae]

I hate the ugliness the world brings out in me.

It also brings out the beauty in you sometimes.

Are you doing all right, Kaltes?

[Kaltes-Herzeleid]

Are you doing all right, Kaltes?

Yeah. Just needed to get it out. Thanks for asking.

[Kadae]

Yeah. Just needed to get it out. Thanks for asking.

That's good. It's nice to get that sort of thing out of your system every now and then.

[Kaltes-Herzeleid]

It also brings out the beauty in you sometimes.

Generally the world elicits a vitriolic hatred, anger, and disgust the likes of which most would be surprised that I feel things like that.

[Kadae]

Generally the world elicits a vitriolic hatred, anger, and disgust the likes of which most would be surprised that I feel things like that.

While that may be true, there's always a flipside to every coin. Sometimes it's just nice to distract oneself from things of that nature by taking in the positive elements.

Of course, that's not to say those things don't matter, but you've written some absolutely beautiful posts about nightmare in the recent past. There's a certain beauty in many of us, as well as in the world. It's just a matter of looking for it.

But, that might just be easy for me to say. I haven't the ability to truly understand what you've been through, but I'm always here in case you'd like a listening ear.

[Kaltes-Herzeleid]

But, that might just be easy for me to say.

My life has been filled with lies, betrayal, manipulation and control. Isolation. Intolerable feelings of inadequacy. The feeling of hate at just being alive and feeling like your anger and hate are crushing you from the inside. I've seen and felt the things I value and love get ripped away from me over and over again.

That ugliness comes back to slap me in the face. Hard. And I'm reminded just how angry I can be and resentment can just permeate from me.

I live in a world that will never like me or accept me.

So yeah, sometimes it hard for me to think there's beauty in anything in this world when all I felt was the horrendous ugliness of it.

I can barely even write the correct words because even then no one will understand. I could probably scream it until my lungs ruptured and my throat bled and that still wouldn't change a thing.

[Kadae]

I could probably scream it until my lungs ruptured and my throat bled and that still wouldn't change a thing.

Man, I'm so sorry you've had to endure all of that. I had no idea you'd gone through so much. I can only wish you the very best of luck for all your future endeavours, and that you may find the peace of mind you deserve.

I admire you for your perseverance.