03-09-2016, 03:58 AM
Naturally when thinking of story and how it will progress leads to ideas that never make it in, so I thought it'd be fun to list off what scenes, and ideas/concepts that never made it into the story or were changed over time.
What is a cutie mark?
Funnily enough, never once is the concept of a cutie mark ever addressed despite the fact in the context Michael (I'll just refer to myself by name rather than "I" for the most part) has no idea what they are. In most stories where a human somehow ends up in Equestria the human is almost always at some point bound to inquire as to what they are.
I at one point did plan on having him ask just what exactly the markings meant shortly after Nightmare and Michael officially become a couple, to which Nightmare would jokingly and flirtatiously ask if he was looking at her rear leading to some shyness and embarrassment on his end.
A suit for the Gala
This very nearly made into chapter twenty, a scene in which Michael awkwardly has to ask Rarity to make him suit for the Grand Galloping Gala. Fortunately for him Princess Cadence happens to walk in and manages to help overcome the initial unease and so Michael gets his suit in the end.
It's referred to in narration at the chapter's beginning, but was cut out to save time and progress the story a bit faster rather than have a chapter that could've amounted to little more than filler.
Discord
The reality warping chaos spirit was considered to make it in, mostly in the Gala sequence. However I feel like if he was at the Gala King Sombra's attack might lose it's impact and be ended with a potential snap of the fingers by Discord. Plus I don't think I'm very good at writing comedy/humor and Discord is a comedic character by nature, so I felt he would be a bit too tough to write for.
Escape
Michael was originally supposed to provoke the guards into a rage with various insults until the more aggressive of the two attempts to outright attack him by thrusting his spear through the bars, to which Michael pulls it in; forcing the guards to unlock the cell and come in to try and retrieve it. Obviously that doesn't end well for them.
I decided not to use this because I planned for the insults to be very vulgar and I felt it just wouldn't fit the tone of the story.
Own worst enemy
Of all the chapters in the story this is the one I put the most thought into. The whole thing involving a tower of darkness and frightening isolation was always present, but the top of the stairs was different. Now the whole thing of having to face an evil self or at least a darker half has been done many, many times. Originally Michael was literally going to fight a manifestation of his worst qualities and win, but frankly the more I thought about it the stupider it sounded no matter what direction I went with it.
In the end I opted for something subtly symbolic and cerebral, and in my opinion vastly more satisfying.
King Sombra's proposition
A rather last minute change. Originally Sombra was going to disclose his offer towards Nightmare Rarity to join him and perhaps more, only to be laughingly rejected. However I ultimately felt it would not fit Nightmare's character to just here him out and then fight, she loves Michael and is not interested in a damn thing he has to say. Period. The moment he attacked Michael was the moment he sealed his fate.
Plus her basically telling him it can be done the easy way (give Michael back and then be killed) or the hard way (be killed in battle and then take Michael back) was much more badass.
Extended duel
Nightmare Rarity and King Sombra's fight was eventually travel outside the castle, including Sombra goring an allusion of Nightmare through only to be surprised that it was a fake and the real Nightmare attacks from some unexpected point, her flying to reach him on gigantic crystal spires and exchanging shots at the other, and then concluding it in the throne room.
King Sombra's alternate fate
This was scraped early on, but it's still noteworthy. Originally I had the Nightmare utilizing her own dark magic to permanently trap King Sombra in an eternal nightmare, unable to awaken again and be in a constant state of terror, plagued by his own fears and horrifying visions.
Not a bad idea, but I felt that having him be crystallized by his own spell and his head smashed was a more conclusive end for him.
What is a cutie mark?
Funnily enough, never once is the concept of a cutie mark ever addressed despite the fact in the context Michael (I'll just refer to myself by name rather than "I" for the most part) has no idea what they are. In most stories where a human somehow ends up in Equestria the human is almost always at some point bound to inquire as to what they are.
I at one point did plan on having him ask just what exactly the markings meant shortly after Nightmare and Michael officially become a couple, to which Nightmare would jokingly and flirtatiously ask if he was looking at her rear leading to some shyness and embarrassment on his end.
A suit for the Gala
This very nearly made into chapter twenty, a scene in which Michael awkwardly has to ask Rarity to make him suit for the Grand Galloping Gala. Fortunately for him Princess Cadence happens to walk in and manages to help overcome the initial unease and so Michael gets his suit in the end.
It's referred to in narration at the chapter's beginning, but was cut out to save time and progress the story a bit faster rather than have a chapter that could've amounted to little more than filler.
Discord
The reality warping chaos spirit was considered to make it in, mostly in the Gala sequence. However I feel like if he was at the Gala King Sombra's attack might lose it's impact and be ended with a potential snap of the fingers by Discord. Plus I don't think I'm very good at writing comedy/humor and Discord is a comedic character by nature, so I felt he would be a bit too tough to write for.
Escape
Michael was originally supposed to provoke the guards into a rage with various insults until the more aggressive of the two attempts to outright attack him by thrusting his spear through the bars, to which Michael pulls it in; forcing the guards to unlock the cell and come in to try and retrieve it. Obviously that doesn't end well for them.
I decided not to use this because I planned for the insults to be very vulgar and I felt it just wouldn't fit the tone of the story.
Own worst enemy
Of all the chapters in the story this is the one I put the most thought into. The whole thing involving a tower of darkness and frightening isolation was always present, but the top of the stairs was different. Now the whole thing of having to face an evil self or at least a darker half has been done many, many times. Originally Michael was literally going to fight a manifestation of his worst qualities and win, but frankly the more I thought about it the stupider it sounded no matter what direction I went with it.
In the end I opted for something subtly symbolic and cerebral, and in my opinion vastly more satisfying.
King Sombra's proposition
A rather last minute change. Originally Sombra was going to disclose his offer towards Nightmare Rarity to join him and perhaps more, only to be laughingly rejected. However I ultimately felt it would not fit Nightmare's character to just here him out and then fight, she loves Michael and is not interested in a damn thing he has to say. Period. The moment he attacked Michael was the moment he sealed his fate.
Plus her basically telling him it can be done the easy way (give Michael back and then be killed) or the hard way (be killed in battle and then take Michael back) was much more badass.
Extended duel
Nightmare Rarity and King Sombra's fight was eventually travel outside the castle, including Sombra goring an allusion of Nightmare through only to be surprised that it was a fake and the real Nightmare attacks from some unexpected point, her flying to reach him on gigantic crystal spires and exchanging shots at the other, and then concluding it in the throne room.
King Sombra's alternate fate
This was scraped early on, but it's still noteworthy. Originally I had the Nightmare utilizing her own dark magic to permanently trap King Sombra in an eternal nightmare, unable to awaken again and be in a constant state of terror, plagued by his own fears and horrifying visions.
Not a bad idea, but I felt that having him be crystallized by his own spell and his head smashed was a more conclusive end for him.