Random thoughts post 'em

[Kaltes-Herzeleid]

I've had this in my mind a couple of days now or so, and I feel it's something I've spoken but never really delved much into.

I have trust problems. A lot. I wholeheartedly believe that I have improved on these issues over the past two or so years, but I still have my weaknesses that at times really do get the best of me at times. Logically I know this is stupid and not true, but emotion ends up overriding logic at times.

I'm suspicious and paranoid about people, even friends. Not continuously, mind you, but there are times my brain jumps to bad conclusions about people and their intentions or what they really think. I fret over abandonment and while it's not as bad as before, I do struggle with not feeling like I'm good enough. That no matter how much I've changed and continue to change, people (namely friends) will avoid me because they hate me. I know not everyone will like me, frankly that doesn't bother me, but there is something about the aforementioned that unsettles me.

I just wanted to put this here out really, probably healthy to do so. Please note this isn't an attack on anybody, just an explanation of some problem I still struggle with now and then.