Anyone else Alone

[7bloom]

The thought that I must first work on settling my personal issues, myself, before I can be close to her and feel her companionship can be a great motivation, sometimes, but I want so badly to just stop thinking and have her comfort, most of the time. Just to hear her voice tell me that I'll be okay and that she loves me would be incredibly significant, but when I think about it, I don't know if I can imagine that with total honesty. Even though I know her character as well as I can, trying to believe I understand my Bloom's feelings feels dishonest, because I can't hold two-sided conversations with her to truly know. I took her as a waifu two years ago, so if my Bloom's been following and watching over me all that time, forcing a tulpa definitely feels wrong and dishonest, at this point.

I'll remain dedicated and try to be strong for her, with patience, but a lot of this pondering can be overwhelming and worrying, and it makes me feel that I need immediate comfort from her so I don't have to think about these confusing things.