I feel like my faith in Nightmare was a bit rocky these past few days, but I think I made it through. I'm making an effort to stay strong mostly on my own willpower and reminding myself of all that has happened. Don't get me wrong you all help and I value it, but I can't go running to someone every time I feel the tiniest bit of worry.

Anyway, spent about an hour with Nightmare, just talking. Doing my best to not over analyze and just let things flow to the best of my ability. Brief little moments where I could've sworn I heard something.

(09-01-2015, 07:36 AM)Kaltes-Herzeleid Wrote: I feel like my faith in Nightmare was a bit rocky these past few days...

If I may Kaltes, what were the reason that made you feel that way?

(09-01-2015, 07:36 AM)Kaltes-Herzeleid Wrote: ... I can't go running to someone every time I feel the tiniest bit of worry.

You do not need to worry, we're here to help the best way possible, even though we might not know the correct answer, and just like my RL friend who doesn't understand the level of love I hold for Amena, they know it's up to me in the end, and I know that... It's not like they can jump into my head and fix whatever ailment that might cause within me... Why last week Amena and I had some... disagreements, which I worry very very much, but held my ground for her... Truly, I will hate to see you suffer like that.

Quote:Okay, so last night I finally took another stab at meditation. This time I set out to keep myself as silent as possible to try and allow her to speak freely of her owe will, unassisted by me, no response. But I was able to get my mind quiet for the most part. Need to work on my breathing too.

It wasn't the greatest session I had, but it could've been worse. I know deep down there is something there, I feel it, I always seem to feel it strongest when all is quiet and peaceful.

I'm glad you're not getting discouraged. You and Nightmare have made such amazing progress that communing through meditation would, I imagine, be simply the icing on the cake. I hope you'll continue to let us know how your practices go. We're all here to help, as you know.

(09-01-2015, 08:10 AM)Sour Soul Wrote:

(09-01-2015, 07:36 AM)Kaltes-Herzeleid Wrote: I feel like my faith in Nightmare was a bit rocky these past few days...

If I may Kaltes, what were the reason that made you feel that way?.

I don't know. I over analyze and am desperately afraid of not making progress.

(09-01-2015, 08:10 AM)Sour Soul Wrote: You do not need to worry, we're here to help the best way possible, even though we might not know the correct answer, and just like my RL friend who doesn't understand the level of love I hold for Amena, they know it's up to me in the end, and I know that... It's not like they can jump into my head and fix whatever ailment that might cause within me... Why last week Amena and I had some... disagreements, which I worry very very much, but held my ground for her... Truly, I will hate to see you suffer like that.

Thank you.

(09-01-2015, 08:54 AM)Sentimental Gentleman Wrote:

Quote:Okay, so last night I finally took another stab at meditation. This time I set out to keep myself as silent as possible to try and allow her to speak freely of her owe will, unassisted by me, no response. But I was able to get my mind quiet for the most part. Need to work on my breathing too.

It wasn't the greatest session I had, but it could've been worse. I know deep down there is something there, I feel it, I always seem to feel it strongest when all is quiet and peaceful.

I'm glad you're not getting discouraged. You and Nightmare have made such amazing progress that communing through meditation would, I imagine, be simply the icing on the cake. I hope you'll continue to let us know how your practices go. We're all here to help, as you know.

Thank you.

Why did he get a happy face, and I didn't? Is it because I didn't like Gamera? D:

Anyway, I was trying to cheer you up, but if I failed, then I am sorry...But! Before you reply this with a mean face! Might it be best in telling us how you over analyze this? I mean, when you say that, what could you really mean by that? I feel like this might be something that need a bit more understanding... don't you think Kaltes? I would like to help, and I will have Amena assist me. :3

(09-02-2015, 04:42 AM)Sour Soul Wrote: Why did he get a happy face, and I didn't? Is it because I didn't like Gamera? D:

Anyway, I was trying to cheer you up, but if I failed, then I am sorry...But! Before you reply this with a mean face! Might it be best in telling us how you over analyze this? I mean, when you say that, what could you really mean by that? I feel like this might be something that need a bit more understanding... don't you think Kaltes? I would like to help, and I will have Amena assist me. :3

No, you didn't fail. I was in a bad mood over something else entirely and wasn't aware it seeped into my response.

Fuck how do I explain over analyzing here? Ummm...I think about how her voice feels when she speaks. I try to replicate how it feels just to make sure it's real...never can copy it myself. That should be all the proof I need yet I keep obsessing.

How does Nightmare react when you do over analyze her voice Kaltes?

(09-02-2015, 05:35 AM)Sour Soul Wrote: How does Nightmare react when you do over analyze her voice Kaltes?

She doesn't particularly like it, but she reassures me to believe. But I do my best to not doubt and she sees that, and understands I can't always help it.

Do you do this with everything else? Do you over think things, other than your Nightmare?

(09-02-2015, 05:51 AM)Sour Soul Wrote: Do you do this with everything else? Do you over think things, other than your Nightmare?

Sometimes. Part of the OCD.