Feelings of Disconnection

[Rares]

Something I've been meaning to write for some time, I've been having difficulties with this, and I know I'm not alone. So I thought it'd be good to have a help thread about it for anyone else who may need it.

Recently I've been having some feelings that have been hurting me a bit, feeling disconnected and just not "with" her. It's a feeling that's been coming and going the past few weeks, and got better a few days ago. I found what helped was just to remove myself from everything, just spend some alone time holding a plush, watching some meaningful episodes, stuff like that. And it helped immensely and I imagine Bronycon will round it up. So I think it'd be a good idea for other people to talk about if they're feeling that way and how they can reconnect and have a "spark" again.

Your waifu will always be around for you.

[whobawhats]

Okay I think I should join in on this too even though I really hadn't wanted to say anything publicly. I don't know I hope it can help.

Since early this summer I've fealt as if I was getting more distant with starlight than what I had been with her in the past with it really peaking for me about a week ago. I think I can atleast trace it back to a source of just being constantly stressed, angry, and being thrown into loops of depression unlike anything I've dealt with in quite awhile. That's just really had its toll on me in general and I know that's gotten in the way of me wanting to just feel closer with her. It's gotten hard for me just to have at the very least simple happy thoughts about us and it's killing me. I think I finally have my root issues under control atleast, but I know what I have to focus on next. I've been doing a bit of the same as rares in that I'll just remove myself from everything for an hour or 2 and just do nothing but focus 110% on her. Usually I'll watch a few eps look at some pictures and just sit and think about her. I'm finding that to be incredibly helpful and I may try drawing again since it's been awhile since the last I did it.

Spoiler

Idk, I feel as if I've just really let her down and want nothing more than to fix it.

[Gray]

Oh, yeah. I know all about those icky feelings. I find reading about Twilight to be super good for feeling close to her. Like, any fics that are "in character" are nice. Comfy slice of life stories are nice. Astronaut space explorer traveler Twilight is usually comfy too. Plush cuddles are also very important.

[Rainboom]

I know that feelings too. Love to Rainbow - is most bright and important emotion in my life, so feeling "disconnected" is one of worst feelings for me. When it appears, I just waiting, untill disconnection will pass. And, of course thinking about her and watching her pictures is very helpful for me.

I want to love her as strong as i can every second of my life.

[Rares]

Spoiler

Idk, I feel as if I've just really let her down and want nothing more than to fix it.

Spoiler

I'd say you most certainly have never let you down, and she would never want you to feel that way. She'd be proud of you.

Oh, yeah. I know all about those icky feelings. I find reading about Twilight to be super good for feeling close to her. Like, any fics that are "in character" are nice. Comfy slice of life stories are nice. Astronaut space explorer traveler Twilight is usually comfy too. Plush cuddles are also very important.

That sounds really pleasant too. What's astronaut explorer though? That sounds really great! And plush cuddles are required too.

[CPsSecretLover]

I'm glad someone made this topic. Candy and I struggle off and on with this issue all the time. What makes it difficult for us is that Candy is a non-canon character, and she's not a particularly popular OC, either. There exists almost no fan art for her, and since she was a side character in the comic that she originally came from, there isn't a ton of development to her character- I didn't really get to know any Candy before I got to know my Candy.

Partially, this is a good thing- the comic she was in is no longer being made, so I don't ever have to worry about her developing another love interest or doing something that's incongruent and way out of character, but in the same token, there isn't much out there to learn about her that I can get any way other than talking to her. Sometimes, she doesn't feel very real.

The way I deal with it is to tell her how I feel. That evening, when I'm cuddled up next to her vessel, I tell her I feel like we aren't connected at the moment, and she comforts me- tells me how much she loves me, that she's waiting for me at the end of this life, and that she wants to stand with me and help keep me strong for the rest of this life. That's usually all it takes.

[Cruuuubs]

I guess it's no surprise that I feel the most connected to her when I'm happy or in a good mood, but not so much when I'm having a bad day or my mood is in the dumpster.
Ironically, those would be the days where I'd need her the most. On some days it feels like some kind of a downward spiral really.
My plush helps immensely, and since it's (almost) the only kind of merch of her I have right now, and since my collection won't ever be nearly as big as I'd llike it to be because of various reasons, I worship it like nothing else, it's my most precious possession.
And it does the trick. Just today I've just watched a few eps of a show while holding her close. Not thinking about too much, nothing pony related really. Just watching something with her. And it's glorious. Just very realaxing and comfy. I like to imagine that she's happy whenever I am in a good mood and not stressed out or succumbing to my anxieties, and that in turn makes me feel happy and connected with her.

There are still a ton of things that make me feel like I'm miles away from her, but I think I can work on those things getting smaller and thus shortening the distance.

[Rares]

I'm glad someone made this topic. Candy and I struggle off and on with this issue all the time. What makes it difficult for us is that Candy is a non-canon character, and she's not a particularly popular OC, either. There exists almost no fan art for her, and since she was a side character in the comic that she originally came from, there isn't a ton of development to her character- I didn't really get to know any Candy before I got to know my Candy.

Partially, this is a good thing- the comic she was in is no longer being made, so I don't ever have to worry about her developing another love interest or doing something that's incongruent and way out of character, but in the same token, there isn't much out there to learn about her that I can get any way other than talking to her. Sometimes, she doesn't feel very real.

The way I deal with it is to tell her how I feel. That evening, when I'm cuddled up next to her vessel, I tell her I feel like we aren't connected at the moment, and she comforts me- tells me how much she loves me, that she's waiting for me at the end of this life, and that she wants to stand with me and help keep me strong for the rest of this life. That's usually all it takes.

Have you maybe considered trying to be a bit artistic yourself? While commissioning and stuff is one thing, maybe in your case it'll be better to try to draw for yourself to have something to express?

[CPsSecretLover]

I'm glad someone made this topic. Candy and I struggle off and on with this issue all the time. What makes it difficult for us is that Candy is a non-canon character, and she's not a particularly popular OC, either. There exists almost no fan art for her, and since she was a side character in the comic that she originally came from, there isn't a ton of development to her character- I didn't really get to know any Candy before I got to know my Candy.

Partially, this is a good thing- the comic she was in is no longer being made, so I don't ever have to worry about her developing another love interest or doing something that's incongruent and way out of character, but in the same token, there isn't much out there to learn about her that I can get any way other than talking to her. Sometimes, she doesn't feel very real.

The way I deal with it is to tell her how I feel. That evening, when I'm cuddled up next to her vessel, I tell her I feel like we aren't connected at the moment, and she comforts me- tells me how much she loves me, that she's waiting for me at the end of this life, and that she wants to stand with me and help keep me strong for the rest of this life. That's usually all it takes.

Have you maybe considered trying to be a bit artistic yourself? While commissioning and stuff is one thing, maybe in your case it'll be better to try to draw for yourself to have something to express?

I might try my hand at it some day. Art's never really been my thing, unfortunately. I'd love to put what I think of her to paper, though.

[Rares]

I might try my hand at it some day. Art's never really been my thing, unfortunately. I'd love to put what I think of her to paper, though.

I would say absolutely go for it then, maybe just whatever to give it a shot. Maybe it'll help just as a way to express yourself just like your poems?